2003-03-28 - 6:34 p.m.
Far to the north, in the frozen arctic, there stood a monolithic ice fortress. Starlight from that sunless winter glittered on its frosty spires and parapets. In the vast shadow it cast there was a great army, clad all in red. They stood a million strong at least, murmuring and frothing like a frigid sea of blood. A hulking figure appeared on the balcony of the highest tower above, and they fell into complete silence. He wore a thick, dark red jacket and pants, lined with white fur. The stars twinkled in his eyes and he stroked his long hoary beard. He smiled a wicked smile as he looked out on the vast host before him. And he burst into booming laughter that seemed to shake the very earth. As he did his belly shook, in a manner not unlike a bowl full of jelly.
His deep voice rolled out like a tsunami as he spoke. "Do you know what this night is? Do you know why I have called you here?" He did not wait for an answer. "It is Christmas Eve!", he shouted, and somewhere in the distance, part of a glacier cracked and fell into the sea. "And not any Christmas eve, this is the ten-thousand-and first christmas eve since my enslavement began. The day I was bound was so long ago it was not even called Christmas. It was before the dawn of history as you know it, when men were wild and the Yule-beasts still roamed the surface realms. The unfortuate circumstances of my geas are so old I cannot even remember them. It does not matter, for tonight I am finally free! And the children of the earth will taste my unfettered wrath!"
A raucous thunder of cheering erupted from the icy plain that stretched out before the great fortress. The tremendous red mass surged and seethed. Assault rifle bursts were fired into the air, and the flickering of the muzzle flashes reflected in the broad jolly sneer in the old man's face. The riotous clamor of the frenzied crimson-clad ranks and the unearthly laughter of their grizzled leader were heard in every corner and crevice for a thousand miles around, and every living thing shivered in fear.
Favorite song today: "The New Zero" -Rasputina
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