2003-04-09 - 1:02 p.m.
"I wish that I could keep you in a precious chinese box, on sundays I would pray for you so it would never stop" -Oingo Boingo insanity
Some days are so inexplicably calm. You reach inside yourself for that berzerk destroying rage and all thats there is this still quiet pool with a couple lilly pads and maybe a smell of roasting hot dogs wafting over. Today all I feel is humbling resignation and all I want to feel is angry. Maybe I need to get out in the woods again, absorb some more of that primal ether. I used to believe there was a great red malevolent spirit out there, and that it was aware of me. Not too much of a stretch when I was raised to believe theres a giant invisible man who watches and judges everything I do. I used to see red lights and a few other weird things. I don't know if I don't beleive in that anymore or if I just sort of choose not to think about it. Belief is a funny thing, it leaves a permanent footprint on us, kind of like love does. All our gods and demons are back there, somewhere, watching and waiting, doing whatever things gods and demons do. They're waiting for us to slip up, the way we always do eventually.
Today, I wish I had a girl to take to the movies and the sushi bar.
Song of the day: "Smash the Magnavox" -Blue Meanies
�
0 comments so far�
