2003-04-12 - 1:23 p.m.
Ugh. I have rolled out of bed, and my head is pounding. I need to take a shower. Last night was highly eventful. I got myself psyched up for it, I listened to andrew w.k. with the volume way up, jumping up and down and singing into a lightbulb. I worked myself into a near euphoric frenzy, I forced myself to be in a really really good mood. I put on my favorite shirt, listened to more music, and headed out for the rendezvous. I met Twink and her beau in a supermarket parking lot and then I led them off to the restauraunt in my car. My handshake was firmer than his, though not too agressive I think. The restaurant I had picked was no longer serving, so we went to another up the street further, where before we had even ordered, three servers were rude to us and we walked out. The third restaurant we tried was also no longer serving. After this almost comical series of events we just gave up and went to the damn sushi bar allready. The sushi was good, as it usually is. Conversation was awkward, but not to the point of halting. The waiter was the best waiter I've ever had. And I've "had" a few. hah hah joke. Anyway, this dude with Twink was a total sweetheart, and has good taste in wine. And food, and he's wicked smart. They are ten times better together than she and I ever were. A hundred times better than I would be with anyone. And then it was over, out of the way. She left in his car and I in mine. I turned the stereo up real loud again, I wasn't alone at all, not with the Cthulhu Ragtime Band rocking hard and loud with me in my car. One need never fear when the CRB has got your back. I'd had a few glasses but my night was just beginning. I drove to this little froo-froo cafe in camden, got there at about ten. I was wondering if maybe Ian was there, and he was. I haven't seen Ian in months. Ian's a genius and a drunk, and before I know it I was in his car heading back to rockland and having the dialogue in my previous entry. We went to a bar and drank the way serious drinkers drink. Shot beer shot beer shot beer beer shot beer shot beer. Yeah I outpaced him on the beer, so I got a extra one in there. I got fucked up hard. I wish I could remember some of the conversation because like I said, Ian's a genius. I think he told me a lot about a bad relationship he's involved in. That sucks, but I'm glad hes suffering in that I hope he writes a book about it that I get to read. Sushi for three: $136 plus tip. Bar tab for two: $76 plus tip. Blowing everything back out the way it came into a dirty toilet in an unfamiliar house at three in the morning: priceless. Woke up on a futon in Ians livingroom at eight and got a ride back to my car. Had a garlic bagel with cream cheese from dunkin donuts, and came home and passed out until one. So now I'm listening to andrew w.k. again, god hes infectious. I cant really bang my head cuz it hurts too much, but I'm forcing myself back into a good mood, because that's where I need to be right now. I don't think I'll want to drink again for another week at least, so I'm going to use the time out to realign my yin and yang or whatever. To make peace with a self thats been leaning towards violence too much lately. I'll do situps and go for long walks. I'll sit and watch the ducks in the pond out back. I'll relax and let go. Thats the plan anyway, we'll see what happens.
Favourite song today: "Girls own Juice" -Andrew W.K.
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