2007-06-05 - 10:12 p.m.

No excuses. I've been doing nothing, when theres a lot that needs doing.

Advice I've been given lately that stuck out, that I listened to.

"Tell people about your plans, it helps make them happen"

"When overwhelmed with things that need doing, pick one thing and do it."

I think I've told everyone I know about my current plan. I guess hearing that just makes me feel a little less stupid for doing so.

The one thing I shoudl pick to do is financial aid for school, its big, its looming, but there are people who can help (I hope, college employees are usually pretty fucking useless, but thats beside the point) Anyway, tomorrow, I am going to get something done about it. Make a phone call or two, get some answers, fill out papers if I have to.

Thats all pretty boring. But maybe worth writing down, for my own sake.

My girlfriend just started work as a camp counselor. While I do enjoy time to myself, I am missing her. It's so nice to be with someone who is so giving and easygoing and just seems to... I dunno, fit? Now scheduling things will be tougher. Not impossible just tougher.

So I've been slacking off, and I feel shitty. I sometimes wonder if I'm capable of pulling things together, or how much I want to. My room is a metephor for my life. Covered is layers of shit I just cant care enough to pick up. And when I think about that, I just want to escape it all. LM has seen my room by the way, and she doesn't care. Part of it is just my personality, I'm a bit sloppy. Clutter is comfortable. But there is also a me who is really unsatisfied with this, who wants to make it look nice, like an awesome hotel room with dragons.

Lost my point again. I need some excersise. Later diary.

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